Wise Words
Can be Strong Words
“Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves,
for the rights of all who are destitute.
Speak up and judge fairly; defend the rights
of the poor and needy.” Proverbs 31:8-9
Instead, speaking the truth in love, we
will in all things grow up into him who is the Head. Ephesians
4:15
When i think about the Book of Proverbs and wise speech, I normally think
about a person who is careful, chooses words with care and practices silence
a good part of the time.
But here in chapter 31, we read that wise words can also be strong words,
and Paul says the same think in Ephesians 4:15 when he says, speaking the
truth in love, we will grow up into Him who is the head. And Paul was no
shrinking violet when it came to speaking his mind.
So being wise does not always mean being a person of few words, or always
being careful and speaking softly.
It can mean speaking out clearly and forcefully when necessary.
First the Ephesians passage.
Paul says we speak the truth in love and grow into maturity.
He is contrasting this with those who practice deception and get their way
through cunning.
I am sure that it can be discouraging when you do your best to be honest
and forthright and experience that you are taken advantage of or just don't
seem to be able to make any headway when there are those who confound you
and your situation with half truths or outright lies.
What do you do?
Say what you believe to be true and do it clearly and forthrightly without
embarrassment.
The truth has its own strength.
You may not get the office promotion, and may feel that you continually lose
out in office politics, but speak the truth and trust in God.
Now there is speaking the truth in anger and there is speaking the truth
in love. Paul talks about speaking the truth in love.
Mind you, I am not saying you cannot speak out when you are angry or feel
you have been injured. God does not intend anyone to become a passive victim.
What I am talking about is the person who can be emotionally abusive under
the guise of honesty.
This is where wisdom comes in.
You do not have to tell everyone what you think about everything.
I think there are some guidelines that are useful.
1. Is this any of my business. Proverbs talks about not going and poking
your nose into things that are not your concern.
In my Rotary club, we are cautioned, it may be the truth but
is it fair and does it really build up those concerned?
Use the truth like an antiseptic and bandage. Not like a club.
2. Are you willing to be part of the solution.
If I offer you my opinion and it ends up being a bit
painful, am I willing to stick with you and be part of the solution.
Dropping hand grenades over the fence is not being part
of the solution, even if you are right.
What is necessary is that you have a relationship with
the person you may be confronting.
3. Has the other person given you permission?
Giving people a piece of your mind may make you feel better,
but is it going to do any good if the other person is not interested in what
you think?
In family therapy there is an axiom...never pursue a
distancer. That means don't chase after someone who isn't interested.
The same is true in speech.
Any good public speaker spends a part of the time getting
people interested in what he or she has to say.
Jesus did it with a good story. If the person is moving
away from you emotionally, you might as well save your breath. They won't
hear you anyway.
There are exceptions of course.
If you are in a work or family relationship with someone who is doing you
an injustice, you need to speak up and say your piece.
Everyone has the right to be able to protect proper boundaries.
Speaking in love means that your intention is the best interests of the relationship
and the other person.
Intention is everything.
Proverbs says strong speech is about speaking up for those who cannot give
voice for themselves.
I spoke about the cashier in the retail establishment, the waiter in the
restaurant, the poorly paid service person who desperately needs their job.
The intent of Proverbs is for the invisible people.
That may be the little child in the school room or the play ground.
Children depend upon us as adults to give them voice. Be strong. If there
is a little one you know whose legitimate voice is stifled, speak out in
their place.
There are classes of people who have no real voice, or who from time to
time may have no voice.
The mentally ill
The elderly and vulnerable
The single parent
You may think of others who suffer in silence who others may never think
of as having no voice.
And that is the point. If you see what others do not see, then it just might
be the God is giving you this insight.
If so, then maybe its because God is putting on your heart a burden for someone.
History is filled with the names of Godly people who made a difference in
their world by being the voice of the voiceless:
William Wilberforce who spoke up for those in slavery. He spent his entire
adult life fighting for them, often feeling total futility, but he did not
give up and eventually prevailed seeing the British parliament finally outlawing
the practice.
Robert Raikes was the voice of the poor and especially the children during
the industrial revolution. Children worked in sweat shops all week long and
were never allowed to go to school. So he organized schools for the children
to learn to read and write. He ran them on Sundays and this was the origin
of the Sunday School. But it started because one man chose to speak for those
who could not speak for themselves.
General Booth of the Salvation Army took up the cause of the poor and homeless.
He had no intention of starting a new denomination. He only wanted to speak
for the voiceless and give them material help.
And speaking is not always with words.
Giving voice to the voiceless may be more about our actions than our words.
Be wise
Be strong
Speak for the forgotten ones.
Speak the truth in love.
Together lets grow up in maturity to be the people of God.
Preached September 29, 2009
Dr. Harold McNabb
West Shore Presbyterian Church
Victoria, British Columbia
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