ANNOUNCER:
And now... PIGS IN SPACE! Starring the indominable Link Hogthrob, the flapable firstmate Miss Piggy, and the inexplicable Dr. Strangepork.
ANNOUNCER:
When last we left the spaceship Swinepork, the ship
had developed a severe list.
HOGTHROB:
(fiddling with controls)
Something has developed with the gyro-slopic --what do you call it Strangepork?
STRANGEPORK:
I don't know, but it's sure going to louse up our billard game tonight.
HOGTHROB:
(points to Strangepork in agreement)
Right.
PIGGY:
(moving to Hogthrob's seat)
Here, maybe I can fix it.
STRANGEPORK:
You?
(the ship is balanced.)
PIGGY:
Oh. There, I fixed it.
STRANGEPORK:
But all you did was sit in Link's seat.
HOGTHROB:
(pointing down to his seat)
Maybe it took a woman's touch. Huh huh.
PIGGY:
(snidely)
It's working, isn't it gentlemen.
HOGTHROB:
Let me get back to my seat here.
(switching seats again)
PIGGY:
Excuse me.
(ship tilts right again, a small desk lamp slide on the "dashboard" to the right also.)
HOGTHROB:
It's doing it again!
STRANGEPORK:
Uh, Piggy, could you come here please.
PIGGY:
What for?
STRANGEPORK:
Just come here.
PIGGY:
Oh, all right.
(more commotion as Piggy makes her way to Strangepork's seat. Hogthrob goes to Piggy's and Strangepork to Hogthrob's seat. Lamp slides, ship tilts to left.)
STRANGEPORK:
(nodding to Piggy)
Link, I think we've found the answer.
HOGTHROB:
(to camera)
Oh?
PIGGY:
It's a coincidence, Strangepork.
STRANGEPORK:
(snidely)
Oh yeah? Why don't you go back to your seat then.
PIGGY:
I think I will!
(commotion as everyone moves. ship and lamp move to Piggy's movements. Piggy and Hogthrob are at Hogthrob's seat. They both eye the lamp, which has moved to the center.)
PIGGY:
(pausing)
Uh, oh.
(she runs to her seat, ship tilts, lamp slides, to the right.)
HOGTHROB:
(dumb realization)
Hey, I get it now!
(points to Piggy)
PIGGY:
One word from you, lard-lips, and your dead.
HOGTHROB:
As you wish, first mate FATSO!
(Hogthrob and Strangepork start laughing)
PIGGY:
(enraged)
Fatso?! That does it!
(she chases them to Strangeporks seat, then jumps back to her's, causing Hogthrob and Strangepork to slide to the wrath of her Karate Chop.)
PIGGY:
Hiiiiii---Ya!
HOGTHROB:
(shoving Strangepork)
Get her away from me!
(the process repeats. Hogthrob and Strangepork moan and groan, Piggy Karate chops again. Repeat.)
ANNOUNCER:
PIIIIIIGS IN SPAAAAAACE!
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